Teach Your Dog to Talk

It is ridiculous to assume that we, humans, are the only ones who can talk! All we need to do is walk outside and listen closely to the creatures around us making melody in their hearts and causing the still morning air to be filled with a natural symphony of sounds.

There is the lonesome call of the young red tail who must venture out on her own to find breakfast. Nearer still, is the soft hum of the honey bee joyfully drifting from flower to flower as her powdered toes spread pollen from plant to plant.  The wind blows where it wishes but we do not see it.  We can feel it softly kiss our cheek as it sweeps by but do we listen to what the wind says?  Can creatures or the elements communicate with us? Believing is receiving!

We miss so much because we are in a hurry to listen. Hear a husky as he circles around and around pleading patiently for you to put on your shoes and take him for a run.  He howls, he groans and he talks!  All you need to do is ask the right questions and your pet will respond enthusiastically because YOU BELIEVE!  Most anyone loves being listened to.  Animals are no exception.

This post, like all the other stories in this blog, is made to help you learn to make friends and influence people in creative ways.  The best way to grab the attention of people is to do something unusual.  A talking dog, parrot or even a conversational cat will stop people in their tracks.

Talking animals put a smile on people’s faces.  Your pet will start an unsolicited response in someone.  Now, you are prepared to start a conversation.  Usually, strangers start talking first.  I am convinced that Journey came to me to help me make new friends.  Chatting with someone who you don’t know, does not come easily for most people but my dog, Journey, is first to say, “hello”.

How do I do I make Journey talk?  What is the procedure?  There are three easy steps.  Watch the youtube videos, and you can see how it is done.  Did I say, three steps?  There are actually, four.  You must guess the fourth way.

  • Step One:  BELIEVING IS RECEIVING.

Do you like to have someone listen to you?  Animals are no exception.  Journey responds to people who talk to him.  This is the first step.  Talk about how you feel to your pet.  For starters, just share what happened to you yesterday. 

Is something bothering you?  If you are angry, one of the best ways to control your temper, is to sit down with your animal and tell him all about it. Petting your dog or cat can actually calm you down and talking-it-out will make you more reasonable about the matter.  Just be sure you pet softly. Remember, animals are sensitive to our feelings.  When we cry, they feel sadness.

What makes you laugh?  Animals love to hear us tell a good joke.  They enjoy the sound of our voices, singing … when nobody else does.  Tell your pet a secret like you would tell your best friend because he is your best friend.

Your dog must believe you listen as well as talk to him.   When you have his full attention, give him lots of praise.  Pets and tummy rubs while you talk will make him feel special.

Are you beginning to see what happens when you talk to your animal?  He actually teaches us to have conversations with people.  That is why pets are often recommended to those of us who are shy.

We cannot give people tummy rubs or scratch them behind the ears but we can listen to someone and give them our undivided attention.  This is better than a hug or a pat on the head.  It means we care about what they think.

Now you are ready for step two?  Ask the right questions.

  • Step 2:  ASK THE RIGHT QUESTIONS.

Most dogs bark, howl or growl.  The usual sound of their voice ends in the “F” sound.  If you google words that end in, “Off” or “Uff”, you will find your dog has a wide vocabulary to choose from.  Watch video one and video two.  Did you notice the questions I asked Journey ended in these sounds?  This is important because you want your dog to sound believable.  First you must believe he can talk, then, you want others to believe it.  Here are some of the questions I asked Journey:

What is the part of the house that keeps the rain out?  ROOF

What do you wear on your ears when it is cold outside?  EAR MUFFS

What do you call it when you scratch my floor with your paws?  SCUFF

When you jump on the sofa, what do I say?  ENOUGH!

How does my voice sound when I get angry?  GRUFF!

When meat is too hard to eat, what is it called?  TOUGH.

The list goes on and on but these are some suggestions.  If your pet is a cat, you must find words that end in , “eow” or “eu” because a cat says, “meow” and a kitten says, “me-uu”

After you have captured the attention of your audience or new friend, you can ask any question regardless of the ending of their answers.  Once people believe, they KNOW your animal is trying to communicate.

  • STEP 3:  GIVE GOOD TREATS!

Find something your dog really loves to eat.  This can be costly if the only thing your friend will eat is steak!  There is a trick to make him believe he is eating meat when he is really eating vegetables!

Did I say, vegetables?  Yes!  Carrots, celery, green beans and many other vegetables can taste like meat.  Cut up your veggies and boil them in beef broth.  It helps to add a little meat to the stew but you can use bones that the butcher will give to you.  Often these bones are free!

Bone marrow is delicious to dogs. Watch the video to see what bone marrow looks like.  We have marrow in our bones.  Most animals, do. You can purchase a marrow bone from your butcher.  One costs about one dollar but the marrow boils out in your stew and flavors everything. 

Journey likes skim-milk, Mozzarella cheese treats.  This is otherwise known as, string cheese.  It is easy to dice up in little chunks. You can buy treats on-line if you have the money to spend.  Buy treats at your favorite pet store, too.  Be sure to take your pet with you to sample the treats.  He won’t like anything as well as home made treats!  People are like this, too!

Have you ever eaten corn beef and cabbage with potatoes?  Then, you know how meat can flavor everything.  The cabbage and potatoes taste exactly like corn beef.  Cabbage can be rolled into little finger-rolls.  Dogs go nuts over these, even if they are not Irish Setters!

  • Step 4 :

          Once you have taught your dog to talk, he will want to share a conversation with everyone.  Often, you will not have to treat him.  He will love getting people to laugh and give him attention.  Animals are natural performers.

          Video three shares one example of how Journey changed a man’s life by talking.  This is no joke.  I have had people literally sit down on the floor beside Journey in the middle of Walmart to hug him and chat with him.  You will be amazed.

          At church, we regularly visit the special needs Bible class for children and adults.  For some reason, known only to our Creator, Journey especially loves these kids.  Children pick up on this right away and the laughter and merriment he generates is golden.  Anyone watching this interaction is also changed.  We marvel at the secret ways animals can heal, teach and bring joy to people.

          There might be a single person or a lonesome widow living in your neighborhood.  Do not be afraid to drop them a note in their mailbox and ask them if they would like to talk to your talking dog.  They will enthusiastically respond with a, “Yes! Of course!”.  This is a good way to start sharing your pet’s new talents.

          I take Journey everywhere I go.  Begin to take walks around the neighborhood and down town.  When someone tells me that Journey is beautiful, that is my signal to stop and let Journey say, “thank you!”

          Enjoy teaching your pet how to talk and keep inventing ways to make friends and influence people with your special companion. 

Spiritual application:  Believing is Receiving.

Matthew 21:22 reads:  “Believing is receiving.”

Jesus tells us that whatever things you ask in prayer, believing, you will receive.  This is good to remember.  Often it takes patience. There are times when our illness takes too long to pass or someone who is angry may hold a grudge a very long time.   God has His own timing but if our request honors the Lord, He will grant it or He may give you a better answer to prayer.

Boundaries application:

Before you believe animals can talk, you must believe YOU can communicate with your animal friend.  Are you believable? 

It is the same with people.  If we do not believe we can have an interesting conversation with friends,  others will not believe it. You must have a good story to tell and br willing to listen to others if you want to engage with others.

If you have a talking dog, parrot or cat, this will start a conversation.  Unless you continue the conversation with your new friend, he will lose interest quickly.  Learn to ask questions that PEOPLE can answer easily.  Here are some good questions:

Do you have a dog or cat? 

Do you listen to him?  Can he talk?

How do you know your dog is happy?

How does he show you he is sad?

What things do you do to make your pet talk?

Most people will eagerly share photos of their pets and tell you how they rescued their animal.  Be sensitive.  LISTEN.  That is what your pet does for you.