by How many times have you asked yourself, “Why doesn’t my friend call me?” Maybe you contact many people but you are too busy to spend time with them. That may be why they don’t spend time with you.
This video shows clearly, it takes some work to fasten two paper clips together. We are drawn to one another for a special reason. There is a treasure waiting to be discovered in each of us. Often, people resist more communication because they do not think you value what they have to share.
Here are some ways to connect with a friend and strengthen the bond between one another. Practice these activities on your pet, your brother or sister. See if they don’t warm up to you more and more:
- Be interested in your companion. Ask him what is happening in his life. Just like a dog enjoys an affectionate back rub or a good brush, people like to know you want to make them feel good.
- Listen to what he says. Respond with a smile, a nod and show him you understand. This does not mean you must solve his problems.
- Share something about yourself.
- You can be trusted. How do you show this? Be on time. Follow through when you promise something.
- Patience is important. Not everyone does things as quickly or well as you do.
- Remember someone’s birthday.
These are just a few things. List five things you do to show you want to spend some time with your friend.
Bible Application:
- 1 Thessalonians 5:11 11 “Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing. …”
- 1 Corinthians 15:33 33 Do not be misled: “Bad company corrupts good character.” …
- Colossians 3:13 13 “Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. …”
There are two things mentioned in these passages that need discussion.
What is bad company? Are there any people who you should politely avoid?
Is there something you did to a friend that made him angry? What can you do about this?
Has your friend done something unforgiveable? What is it? How can you forgive someone if that means they may do this again?
Boundaries Application:
If you express an interest in someone, it is the highest compliment you can give them. He or she feels special. In a world that competes to be the best at everything, can you be the best at being yourself?
Boundaries are about treating yourself and others kindly. Know what to expect of yourself and others.
- Ask your friend if anyone has hurt his feelings. Open a conversation about this sensitive issue. Be willing to share how someone hurt you.
- If someone has done something that is not right, be ready to say why you think this is a problem that may destroy your friendship. Say this, “I really like you. Nothing can stop me from liking you but I do not like the way you behaved. Please change this behavior.”
- Stop the behavior immediately that is destroying your friendship. Be clear. Say, “I feel angry when you do this or I am frightened when you do this. Explain the issue and be clear that if your friend continues, you will not call him until he changes.
- Be sure to always open and close your conversation by saying something honest and good about a person. Tell him why you need him as a friend.
Boundaries are tough. People do not like to be told that they cannot visit you unless they call you, first. Most people think they are loved no matter what time of day they call you. This is true and you must be certain to tell your friend nothing they say or do will keep you from loving them but they must show that they love and respect YOU. Your feelings are important, too.
List five boundaries you set with friends:
